Sunday, August 14, 2011

Rejection: For Fun And Profit

When I was on a work trip a few weeks back, my co-workers and I were chatting over dinner, and somehow got to to talking about the Rejection Line. Never heard of it? One of them hadn't either, so I called it and put it on speakerphone for group entertainment.

(Call it right now if you never have -- 212-479-7990).

Someone suggested that Seattle needed a local Rejection Line, since the New York area code kind of made the whole thing fishy for us west coasters. Last weekend, I discovered there IS a Seattle rejection number.

It's mine.

"Hey :-)" came the text message from an unknown number.

"I'm sorry, but I don't recognize your number. Who is this?" While my gut reaction was to respond with a little more attitude, I have my cell listed on my business cards and toned it down a bit.

"It's Don. We met on the bus this evening. The guy with the Bud Light sign."

I don't use public transportation. This was clearly a mistake. I let him know, he apologized, and I thought how strange it was that this had happened the previous weekend, too.

Minute later, a new number texted me:

"Hey :-) It's Daren. Nice to meet you today. That was fun on the bus. You work tomorrow?"

All of these people mentioned the bus... and it clicked. Some crazy itchy bee was giving out my number as her own to men on public transportation.

"Someone has been giving out my number as her own, but I'm afraid it isn't me. I don't ride the bus. I'm sorry."

"Oh wow. So sorry. I had no idea. That is really messed up," came the response. Then: "Well, I guess it's never too late to make a new friend! How was your weekend?"

Great.

"Thank you but no. I don't really want to talk. I'm sorry someone was rude to you but you can throw away this number now."

He apologized and left me alone... for two days.

"Hey, I know you weren't really in the mood to talk before. But I couldn't help but to ask how you are doing? How is your week going?"

So. Anyone want to sponsor this impromptu career I'm starting? I will happily mention your company in my rejections.

"I'm sorry, but I'd rather be eating ____while watching _____, my favorite ____, than text or talk to you. But for comfort during this terrible time of rejection, may I suggest trying _____?"

Get in touch, sponsors. I'm open to your offers.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, what a predicament! But at least you're turning it into a business opportunity LOL Here's to not having any more rejection texts

Fijufic said...

Aww Sweet idea...

Hilarious as usual.

Cheers,
Bobby

Dave said...

Wow. At least you can turn someone's rudeness into a business opportunity :)

Buck said...

Christina, this is hilarious! I've met the Alt rider team at some of the BMW rallys, and they are a great crew. Jeromy and Brianna are awesome folks!

Your blog is crative and funny! Thanks for sharing!

Semper Fidelis, Ignatius

Sara said...

You know this guy was thinking he could get a Rom/Com style story out of this.

"You tell it. You want me to tell it? Okay. So, I'd met this girl on the bus who gave me her number. When I texted it, I got Christina! Anyway, Christina and I got to talking and we decided to just take a leap of faith and meet for sushi (she just loves her salmon skin rolls!). Anyway, the rest is history."